纯粹因为爱而翻译的，还有不少错误存在，英语真的很深奥啊……
因为文不是我写的，纯粹翻译，所以转载的话请先去支会一下作者
 
色狼与德国香肠（ORZ）
APH欢乐相故事：路德，法叔，意呆，妹控，列支
 
Once upon a time in a small little village surrounded by the woods, there was a small girl whose name was Little Red Riding Hood. Of course to those that have some common sense would know that that wasn’t her real name. No, in this story, her name was Liechtenstein. Yep, even her real name was a mouthful but back to the story.
很久很久以前在一个被树木环绕的小村庄里有一个小女孩，她的名字叫做小红帽。当然有些常识的人知道这不是她的真实名字。当然，在这个故事里，她的名字叫做列支敦士登。好吧，即使她的真名有点拗口但还是让我们回到故事中吧。</STRONG>
 
One day, Liechtenstein was watching her father dart back and forth around the kitchen, packing item after item into a small hand-woven basket.
有一天，列支敦士登看着她的父亲在厨房里忙进忙出，将一件件东西放进手提篮中。</STRONG>
 
“Okay, kid,” Germany, I mean, Liechtenstein’s father stated, “you’re grandma’s sick after having one too many pizzas and is crying about how much her stomach hurts,” he placed a bottle into the basket and sighed. “I said ‘no, you’ll get sick’ and what does she say? ‘It’s alright~’” the German said in a thick Italian accent and forcefully stuffed the wurst into the basket. “And on top of that, her brother’s going to be a big pain in the ass until she gets better.And another thing too, why can’t she come down here and get some medicine? If she can run away from soldiers, she can run down here. Now I have to send my kid 5 miles through nothing but trees and knowing perfectly well that there are wolves and another thing-”
“好了，孩子，”路德，我是说列支敦士登的爸爸说，“你奶奶因为一次吃了太多的披萨而胃疼，”他将一瓶酒放进去后指给小列支看。“我告诉他‘别吃了，你会生病的’但你知道他怎么说‘没关系的’~”路德一边模仿意呆的语气说话一边狠狠的将德国香肠塞进篮子里。“而且最主要的是，在她好起来之前他那个兄弟会是个大麻烦。还有，为什么他不到这里来拿点药？如果他能从军队里逃出来，他就能到这里来。害得我现在不得不让我的女儿穿过满是树木可能还有狼或者其他什么东西的森林……”</STRONG>
 
“Father…”
“父亲大人……”
 
“WHAT?!” Germany screamed, officially scaring the crap out of the little girl. She pointed a finger at the basket that was being over stuffed by smashed wurst. Germany turned a red and took his wurst-covered hand out of the basket. “Okay, I think that’s enough”
“怎么了！？”路德大吼起来，那严肃的表情让小姑娘吓得连忙躲到一旁。她指了指那快要被德国香肠挤破的篮子。路德的脸一下子红了，连忙将他那抓满德国香肠的手从篮子里拿出来。“好吧，我想这些应该够了。”（抱怨归抱怨你还是很担心他的吧，路德啊……扶额）</STRONG>
 
Germany placed the basket down on the table in front of Liechtenstein and straightened his voice. “Stay on the path to your grandmother’s and don’t talk to strangers, understand? NOBODY”
路德将篮子从桌上拿下来放到小列支面前，清了清嗓子说：“去你奶奶要那走大路而且别和陌生人讲话，知道了么？谁都不行。”</STRONG>
 
“Okay, father” she said quietly and still afraid. She wrapped her pale fingers around the handle of the basket and walked out the door.
“好的，父亲大人”小列支怯生生的回答。然后她就用她那白皙的手指抓起篮子走了出去。</STRONG>
 
Now somewhere deep in the forest, just like Germany had said, was a wolf. A French wolf to be more precise. As he was going along on his daily stroll to see if there were any people to molest, err.. eat… yeah… let’s go with that. As he was on his stroll, he spotted a young girl in a cute red hood. He licked his lips, smoothed out his hair and tiptoed closer to the small girl.
在森林的深处，就像路德说的那样，有一只狼，确切的说是一只法国狼。当他正在做每日的散步活动想找找看有没有人能让他性骚扰一下，额……是吃……对，是吃，让我们还是按照这个继续下去吧。当他在散步的时候，他注意到了一个小女孩穿着一件可爱的小红斗篷。他舔了舔嘴唇，梳理了一下头发然后踮起脚尖悄悄的接近小列支。</STRONG>
 
Liechtenstein hummed to herself as she walked through the dark forest until she smelled a strong scent of something. She stopped walking and began to sniff the air that smelled strong of cologne.
小列支一边哼着歌一边往森林深处走去，忽然她闻到了一种很刺鼻的味道。她停下来使劲的嗅了嗅，发现那是一股很浓的古龙水味。</STRONG>
 
“Good afternoon, Little Red” a smooth voice said behind her and she wheeled around to see France Wolf staring down at her with a slick and dazzling smile.
“早上好，小红帽！”她身后传来一很温柔的声音，她转身一看，看到法国狼正低头盯着她，脸上带着虚伪和不怀好意的微笑。</STRONG>
 
“I’m supposed to stay away from strangers” the small girl said, forgetting her German father said don’t talk to strangers. France smiled.
“爸爸和我说别接近陌生人！”小列支说，但她忘了路德爸爸和她说的是别和陌生人讲话。法叔仍在微笑</STRONG>
 
“But darling, I am not a stranger . . . or a wolf bent on getting into your pants. I am a forest ranger!” he said. Never had Liechtenstein seen a forest ranger with wolf ears and a tail.
“但是达令，我不是陌生人……或者是一只非常想要进入你内裤的狼。（ORZ法叔你想干吗！）我是护林员！”他说。小列支从来没见过一个护林员有狼的耳朵和尾巴。</STRONG>
 
“Really?” she asked.
“真的么？”她问。</STRONG>
 
“Yeah, stay away from bears but wolves are your best friend, my dear” France said and kissed Liechtenstein’s hand. “So, where are you headed to?”
“当然（是假的），你要小心熊但狼是你的朋友（你是最危险的，口胡！），我亲爱的。”法叔亲了亲她的手背。“那么，你这是要到哪去？”</STRONG>
 
“My grandmother’s house. She’s sick so I’m bringing her wurst, see?” the young girl stated and held out the basket that was dripping with wurst juice from the bottom. France quickly covered his nose.
“去我奶奶家。她生病了所以我带了德国香肠去给她，看啊？”小列支一边说一边将底部不断流出德国香肠汁水的篮子举到他面前。法叔飞快的掩住了他的鼻子。</STRONG>
 
“Sacre bleu! Are you trying to kill you’re grandmother?! Or is your dad England in this story?”
“妈呀！你打算杀了你奶奶么？！难道在这个故事里亚瑟是你爸爸？”</STRONG>
 
“No, it’s Germany” Liechtenstein corrected and France nodded.
“不，是路德”小列支纠正他，法叔表示理解的点点 阅读全文>>