Jean901
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国外幽默（笑话）集锦（</SPAN>222~226</SPAN>）</SPAN> （英汉对照）</SPAN> </SPAN> “Laughter, the Best Medicine.</SPAN>”</SPAN> “笑是良药。” </SPAN> Address</SPAN> </SPAN></SPAN> When my son joined the attorney general’s office in large city, he was asked to address a senior-citizen group. He spoke about “scams” perpetrated on older people, and was really pleased at the end of his talk, sensing that the seniors had seemed very interested and very receptive. “Any questions?” he asked. One woman raised her hand. “I got a granddaughter</SPAN>——are you married?”</SPAN></SPAN> ——Contributed by Ruby Kaplan</SPAN></SPAN> 222.</SPAN>演讲</SPAN> 我儿子在一个大城市的总检察长的办公室工作。要求他对老年人组演讲。他讲了关于老年人犯罪的故事，讲话结束时真的很高兴，感觉这些老年人对于他的演讲似乎很感兴趣，也乐于接受。“还有什么问题吗？”他问。一位妇女举起手来。“我有个孙女——你结婚了吗？”</SPAN> ——卢比.</SPAN>卡普兰提供</SPAN> Not recognizing Stars?</SPAN> Martina Navratilova</SPAN>① went to a swank Manhattan restaurant with friends and asked the maitre d’ when breakfast was served.</SPAN></SPAN> “No breakfast today, only brunch,” he replied curtly, obviously not recognizing her.</SPAN> “Okay, when is brunch served?”</SPAN> “It’s $29.95 per person,” he said, looking at the casually dressed Martina as if she could ill afford such luxury.</SPAN> “Once again, when is brunch served?”</SPAN> As the maitre d’ perused his reservation book, Navratilova and friends left. Adds the tennis star, </SPAN> “On the street I passed a panhandler. When I walked by he waved and shouted, ‘Hey, Martina! How’s it goin’?’”</SPAN> ——Bryan Miller in New York Times</SPAN></SPAN> 223.</SPAN>不认识明星吗？</SPAN> 玛蒂娜.</SPAN>娜拉提诺娃</SPAN>①和几个朋友来到优雅的曼哈顿饭店，问饭店领班什么时间供应早餐。</SPAN></SPAN> “今天没有早餐，只有早午餐。”他简单地回答，显然并不认识她。</SPAN></SPAN> “好的，什么时间供应早午餐呢？”</SPAN></SPAN> “每位</SPAN></SPAN>$29.95</SPAN>，”他回答，随便的看了一眼玛蒂娜的穿着，好像她享受不起这样奢侈的消费。</SPAN> “再问一下，什么时间供应早午餐呢？”</SPAN></SPAN> </SPAN></SPAN>当饭店领班细读预订单的时候，娜拉提诺娃和朋友们就走了。这位网球明星又说：“我在大街上碰到一位乞丐，当我从旁经过时他挥着手喊道： “嗨，</SPAN>玛蒂娜，您最近好吗？”</SPAN> ——布赖恩.</SPAN>米勒摘自《新纽约时报》</SPAN> 注①名人..</SPAN></SPAN> 玛蒂娜.</SPAN>娜拉提诺娃</SPAN>(martina navratilova</SPAN>)</SPAN>捷克裔美籍网球选手，曾赢得九度温布尔顿网球公开赛、四度美国公开赛、三度澳洲公开赛，以及两度法国公开赛的后座。</SPAN> We</SPAN>’re not interested in you</SPAN></SPAN> Tyne Daly of Tv’s “Cagney & Lacey” was in a hotel with her family when the paparazzi sprang out. “My kids were upset,” says Daly,“ so I walked up to the men and told them, ‘Listen fellows, give us a break. We’re on vacation.’ They said, ‘We’re not interested in you, lady. Elizabeth Taylor’s in the hotel.’”</SPAN> ——Mary Gordon in Ms.</SPAN></SPAN> 224.</SPAN>我们对你不感兴趣</SPAN> 电视剧《美國警花》（或卡格尼与莱西）中的泰恩.</SPAN>戴利带着她的家人在一家旅馆，当时正值狗仔队的兴起。“我的孩子很不满，”戴利说，“所以我上前对那些男人们说：‘听着，伙计，让我们休息一会儿，我们在度假。’他们说：‘我们对你不感兴趣，夫人，伊利沙白.</SPAN>泰勒在这家旅馆里。’”</SPAN> ——玛丽.</SPAN>戈登（女士）提供</SPAN> Share the umbrella with any woman</SPAN> </SPAN> On a rainy day, a fellow student asked my brother if he saw any woman going their way with whom he could share his umbrella. When my brother asked why, the student popped up a brightly colored, flowered umbrella and explained, “So no one will think this is mine!”</SPAN> ——Contributed by Ernelda Odom</SPAN></SPAN> 225.</SPAN>与女士分享雨伞</SPAN> 一个下雨天，一位同学问我兄弟，如果他在路上遇到一位女士，能与她分享自己的伞吗？当我兄弟问为什么时，这个学生突然拿出一只鲜亮的彩色的花伞说：“这样就没有谁会认为这伞是我的！”</SPAN> ——欧内尔达.</SPAN></SPAN> 奥多姆提供</SPAN> My first college play</SPAN> It was my first college play, and I was extremely nervous as I made my entrance onstage. In my role as a jealous husband, I was supposed to pick up an alarm clock and stare malevolently at its face while delivering my surly comments. Unfortunately, as I reached for the clock, I forgot my next line. Then I realized that I was staring at the back of the timepiece. As my mind raced desperately to remember the dialogue, someone from the audience suddenly called out, “So tell us, where it was made?”</SPAN> ——Contributed by David London</SPAN></SPAN> 226.</SPAN>第一次学院演出</SPAN> 这是我的第一次参加学院演出。当我走上舞台的时候，心里特别紧张。我的角色是个爱猜疑的丈夫，我被假定见到了一个闹钟，不怀好意地看着闹钟表面，说出我无理的台词。当我伸手拿闹钟的时候，忘记了下面的台词。当时我知道我正凝视着闹钟的背面。我心里拼命地旋转着，想记起对话，这时观众中的某人突然大声叫喊：“快告诉我们，它是哪儿生产的？”</SPAN> ——大卫.</SPAN>伦敦提供</SPAN> 摘译自《Reader’s Digest</SPAN>》 Vol.132 No. 792 April 1988</SPAN></SPAN> </SPAN> 阅读全文>> |
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“2009陕西省汽车场地越野邀请赛·宝鸡站”新闻发布会于2009年6月26日在宝鸡市万利酒店胜利召开。
本次大赛是由陕西省航空无线电汽车摩托车运动管理中心批准，由宝鸡市体育局、陕西省汽车摩托车运动协会主办，陕西宝鸡飞焰天会展服务有限公司与陕西风豹汽车运动推广有限公司共同承办。本次大赛旨在推动陕西汽车运动的发展，挖掘陕西汽车运动精英。使陕西汽车极限运动走向正规化、规模化，促进宝鸡汽车运动的推广与发展。
“2009陕西省汽车场地越野邀请赛·宝鸡站”新闻发布会在宝鸡胜利召开 新闻发布会现场 参加本次新闻发布会的领导有：陕西省航空无线电汽车摩托车运动管理中心主任、陕西省汽车摩托车运动协会主席刘伟荣先生、陕西省航空无线电汽车摩托车运动管理中心副主任、陕西省汽车摩托车运动协会副主席王超英先生、宝鸡市政协副主席张望先生、宝鸡市体育局局长李富生先生、陕西省汽车摩托车运动协会执行副主席祁连山先生、陕西风豹汽车运动推广有限公司总经理乔彦峰先生、宝鸡飞焰天集团董事长（总经理）王宁先生。 另外，还有来自福建东方赛车俱乐部的资深车手郑东强先生、西安大风车队队长王维忠先生、陕西帝都车队车手吕重峰先生、 |
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在淡季市场冲击波的影响下，三亚酒店一手抓改造、一手抓经营、一手抓培训，在淡季期间苦练内功。三亚果喜大酒店举行第三届员工服务技能大赛，提高酒店全员服务质量。三亚湾天福源度假酒店狠抓各项培训，如消防培训、微笑培训、执行力培训等，重新修订各项管理条例，并对部分康乐项目进行整改，以更好的服务形象迎接旅游旺季的到来。 同时，三亚旅游企业还针对自由人游客推出实实在在的优惠措施。“越是旅游淡季越需要人气”，湘投银泰度假酒店总经理刘凯强说。该酒店不仅调低客房报价，还推出“机票+酒店”套餐。与此同时，海南旅游夏季自由人套餐、夏季高尔夫清凉之旅套餐等产品也接踵登场。 不仅如此，三亚旅游饭店还积极开展行业合作、联合营销，充分发挥旅游资源优势，打造三亚酒店业的“网络营销”。 三亚金舜旅行社总经理李哲峰告诉记者，这段时间，他们旅行社基本上没有歇着，最主要的工作是忙于设计新的旅游产品，将在“七一”期间推出的红色革命老区游就很受三亚游客的欢迎。”他说，旅行社在淡季与其“苦度时光”，还不如另辟蹊径，多动脑子进行生产自救。 |
